The Truth About Lawsuits
One day I was sitting opposite a client whose child had been hurt and was starting a lawsuit on the child’s behalf.
But we weren’t talking about legal strategy.
Instead, the client was telling me about how they felt like they failed as a parent, and as a person.
They spoke of their shame, their sense of powerlessness, and their sadness.
Yes, they were looking to advocate on behalf of their child and get justice to ensure something similar didn’t happen again. But they were also looking to heal. To reassemble the pieces.
They were looking to bounce back. To be their own hero. To be the character in the story who manages to win. The one we root for, who gets their happily ever after.
There’s something a lot of people don’t realize about lawsuits.
Lawsuits can’t put things back to the way they were.
Instead, they’re a way of seeking compensation. And it’s important to understand that compensation is only a substitute for what you’ve lost, not a complete replacement.
While the outcome of a winning lawsuit can look after some of the practical components of a problem (let’s be honest for a moment, money might not solve everything, but it definitely helps with a LOT of things), a lawsuit, can’t put things back to the way they were “before”.
And starting a lawsuit alone won’t automatically bring you triumph that will secure your “happily ever after”.
And other than maybe getting a few extra $, rarely are people infinitely better off at the end of the day. Most people would tell you that they would far prefer to go back to the way things were before they were wronged in the first place.
They start the lawsuit as the victim and come out of the lawsuit as the victim.
It’s not exactly the look of a hero.
That’s why your strategy needs to think a lot bigger.
Because if sh-t has hit the fan and there’s a massive mess to clean up, then you might as well throw on a new coat of paint in a more flattering colour while you’re at it.
And I don’t know about you, but I’d far prefer to keep on improving in life (or, as I like to joke, keep getting hotter with age).
Yes, there will be times when a lawsuit needs to be a part of your strategy.
Because if you allow it to, whatever event triggered the lawsuit can also be the impetus to you finally taking action to live your dream life.
When you look at people who are revered after going through a horrific experience, you’ll notice that they’re not revered for being the victim.
They’re revered for overcoming the victimhood.
They’re revered for making it through to the other side.
They’re revered for what they’re making of the experience. For their strength and resilience.
In the case of that client, they decided that they would be an example of a parent who doesn’t back down in the face of adversity. A parent who took necessary steps to handle the practical side of the problem (i.e. seeking legal recourse), and also a parent who demonstrated resilience. Who helped their child develop their own coping skills. Who showed the child that life isn’t over just because of a setback. Who showed the child that you can take a momentary loss and turn it into a longer-lasting win.
Who showed their child that a conflict strategy can also be a comeback strategy.
You are not a victim.
So what will your comeback look like?
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