Negotiation 101: Everything You Need to Know
From childhood to adulthood, there are many crucial life skills that are developed. We learn to communicate, create relationships, manage finances, and so much more. One skill that many of us are introduced to, but perhaps haven’t mastered yet or have the tools to practice in a healthy and constructive manner, is negotiation.
Healthy negotiation is practiced in many aspects of life, from family and relationships, to your career and overall participation in society. If you’re looking to sharpen your negotiation skills and take a healthier approach to your communication, problem solving and more, this article is for you!
Why Negotiate?
Having the ability to properly negotiate may be the key to your success in your life. Or at least contribute to it! Often seen as an important skill to have when bargaining, being able to negotiate constructively can help you in many areas of your life.
It isn’t just about getting a great deal on a product or service. Negotiation can help advance your career, navigate conflict in a relationship, create healthy boundaries within your family unit, and so much more.
What Does Healthy Negotiation Look Like?
Healthy negotiation can help you and another party to find a win-win resolution, or an agreement that is mutually beneficial. With the right strategy, tactics and communication, you can navigate your negotiation while still maintaining trust, respect and civility with the other party involved - all while getting what you want!
The Elements of Healthy and Constructive Negotiation
Your Goal
Determining a goal can help to outline the criteria of negotiation. By providing yourself with an outcome to work toward, you can better plan, strategize and communicate with the other party.
Questions to ask prior to negotiating can include:
What is the goal?
What do I/we want to accomplish?
What would result in a positive outcome?
What is the measurement of success?
What are possible alternatives to the goal?
What are my/our deal-breakers?
It’s easy to go off track during a negotiation, no matter the variables or situation. With multiple people involved with varying opinions and ideas to communicate, the room can quickly become filled with different voices and even steer away from the main objective.
By outlining a goal, it can be much easier to get back on track and bring ideas full circle.
Preparation
There are a few things to take into consideration when preparing for a negotiation. This can include finding basic information about the other party, determining your strengths and weaknesses (and theirs), researching negotiation tactics, and outlining your goal(s), along with any talking points.
It may also be helpful to determine your authority to make binding commitments or agreements, along with any hard timelines or boundaries that must be respected or upheld.
A negotiation coach or life coach can help you with your preparation and help you feel more confident going into the interaction.
Strategy
Through your research, you will likely find information regarding negotiation techniques. This can include techniques you may encounter from the other party, as well as those you may want to have in your toolbox. Please keep in mind that some strategies are fair and respectful, while others simply “play dirty”.
Your strategy should take into account strengths and weaknesses on both sides, along with how your strengths can contribute to your end goal. If the other party chooses to use a certain bargaining tactic, you need to be ready to object, diffuse and keep things on track.
Some strategies, good and bad, can include:
Take it or leave it
Exaggeration or misrepresented facts
Commitment limitations
Inviting unreciprocated offers
Good cop, bad cop
Belittling the alternatives
Insults and feather ruffling
Shock value statements
If the other party appears to be standing strong with their position and simply will not budge, be prepared to walk away from the table. You can always pick negotiations back up at a later date. Knowing your deal-breakers in advance can help you feel confident in making the decision to pause or walk away.
An important part of any strategy is to plan alternatives. In the case that you cannot come to an agreement, having a set of alternatives or a back-up plan can help to keep the ball rolling. It can also help to ensure that both parties do not walk away empty handed.
Self-Awareness
Knowing when to stop talking and listen to the other party is key to a successful negotiation. Even after the other party has agreed to your terms, continuing to talk and drive down your point can often come across as aggressive, negative or even lead to the other party walking away.
Constructive negotiation is equally about talking as it is listening. You should always provide the other party with equal opportunity to state their case and communicate their needs and wants.
It’s also important to keep in mind that once you have said something, that it cannot be taken back. Take your time to listen, contemplate and then communicate your response.
Respect
Keep your negotiation constructive by maintaining a respectful atmosphere. If the other party objects, don’t get defensive. Instead, ask for clarification and get specifics.
An objection also provides you with the perfect opportunity to listen and formulate a strong response. Interrupting or rebutting too soon may leave the other party feeling disrespected or as though they weren’t able to properly communicate their thoughts and opinions.
Trying to win an argument will not get you what you want, decreasing the odds of coming to a win-win resolution. Instead, sit back and listen, then provide the other party with a response once they are finished.
Treating the other party with respect will also help to ensure a smooth transition as you come to an agreement and progress toward a mutually beneficial outcome.
Highlight Your Strengths
Set the tone for your negotiation by highlighting your strengths early on. By taking maximum advantage of the strengths that you bring to the table, you can add bargaining power and establish a strong foundation for your case.
Highlighting your strengths early on can also help eliminate the need to play catch-up later on, which can come with its own set of difficulties and potentially leave you at a disadvantage.
Exchanging Offers
The offer is about so much more than just a dollar amount. It will include all notable elements of the deal and negotiation.
Depending on the situation, it may account for:
The price and all financial details
The scope of responsibilities, work and timeline
The included products and/or services
Warranty, terms and conditions
You may wish to present your offer in writing and include specifics. Likewise, once you reach an agreement, you may wish to put the terms down on paper to avoid any miscommunication,
Involving a Neutral Party
Depending on the nature of your negotiations, you may want to include a neutral party, such as a mediator or coach. This person can help to ensure a fair, respectful and successful negotiation. If tensions are running high or communication is no longer effective, the neutral party can step in and recommend a change in approach, recess or to continue at a later date.
Building Your Negotiation Skills
Are you looking to build or sharpen your negotiation skills? Here is an action plan to help you get started on the right track:
Take a proactive approach through research, planning and preparation.
Practice often with help from a coach, colleague, superior or mentor.
Be prepared to make mistakes and, even better, learn from them.
Put pen to paper, play “devil’s advocate” and find the holes in your strategy.
Find a negotiation coach or life coach who can help you to sharpen your skills.
For more information or to find out how negotiation coaching and life coaching can help you, get in touch today to book your free discovery call. Coaching can help to improve your health and overall lifestyle in many ways. Whether you are looking to better define your purpose in life or transition smoothly through a lifestyle change, life coaching may be the right solution for you.
